Need examples of witty writing with few words?

Check out The Listings in The New York Times’ Weekend Arts section. You’ll find some succinctly superb snippets under Long-Running Shows. Here are my favorites from last Friday:

Billy Elliot The Musical
Ballet dreams in coal country

Mamma Mia
The jukebox musical set to the disco throb of Abba

Chicago
Jazz Age sex, murder, and razzle-dazzle

West Side Story
Romeo on Juliet’s fire scape, once again

Wicked
Oz rivisited

Mary Poppins
Supernanny

What are your favorite examples of ultra-short writing that packs a punch? Share away.

I’ve been trying to order an iPhone 4 since 1am this morning. But AT&T’s crappy networks and Safari’s session expirations were preventing me from getting closer to My Precious. Thankfully, the new Apple Store app on the iPhone worked like a breeze. It took me two minutes to pre-order. Give it a try.

After you make the reservation, the app might give you an error if try to reserve another one. So I guess it’s one per customer.

Your portfolio doesn’t need extra doodads, tassels, sequins. If your design work and writing is awful, it’s still awful no matter how much you dress it up. And since student work almost always is terrible, I’m much more interested in your enthusiasm, how well you think, and the quality of your writing.

Good portfolios are simple, unassuming, and relatively cheap to make. Even a humble wire-o bound portfolio works. Big images, lots of process work, readable type, and good writing is all you need.

So if you’re a student, don’t shell out $400 dollars to make a precious museum-piece portfolio. Instead pay down your student loans, or spend the money on an HTML/CSS class.

It’s old, but here’s my portfolio from ages ago.

Not.

Turns out, all it did was stress me out at home and on the weekends. There’s always an annoying email about a problem I can’t do anything about since I’m not in the office. And usually, the sender finds another way to solve the problem.

More emails just meant more worry.

So, this weekend I’m completely separating my work email from my personal email. If there’s a real urgent need to get a hold of me, then call me. ;-)

After looking at all the jobs I’ve had, I realized one thing: when I stopped learning, I became much more keenly aware of other job factors like salary, office space, and vacation time. Boredom makes it way easier to obsess about money and perks.

The jobs where I learned the most were the ones I stayed the longest. I’ve been at DDO for over three years and expect to be here for a long time.

Why?

Because the office has a culture of learning, sharing, and mentoring. We even get an education budget every year. Free classes? Hell yeah.

A job that teaches you keeps you interested. It also makes you nimble and adaptable when major changes happen—like a downfall in the economy or a shift in technology standards. This versatility makes you more employable now and in the future.

Of course, money and perks matter too. But they’re not permanent. The skills and knowledge you learn on a job stick with you for a lifetime. The education you gain can’t be taken away from you.

I’m home sick today. So I thought I’d end my sabbatical and return to LifeClever with an iPad post:

Like a lot of folks, I pre-ordered the iPad for an April 3rd launch-day delivery. Big mistake. UPS didn’t deliver until 3pm. And by then, my friends had picked up their magical iPads from the Apple Store and were making mad love to them.

But delivery had a bonus.

The iPad box is shipped inside a larger box. To keep it from moving around inside the bigger box, the smaller box is bookended by two nifty cardboard brackets.

The brackets happen to hold condoms perfectly. Just what this single man in San Francisco needed. It’s exactly what Apple intended.

Thank you, Steve and Jonathan.

Badump badump badump… Do I sense a heartbeat here on LifeClever. ;-)

My partner and I broke up.

After five years, it feels like getting a divorce. I’ve had a rough year. And the past few months have been especially emotional, intense, and extremely complicated.

Good news: I have a new place of my own and slowly getting settled in. I’m feeling happier. I’m moving forward. And I have Internet and TV again. Thank god for Mad Men and True Blood.

Expect more from me soon.

I’m running a little contest for my friends at Art House Films to promote their new documentary, Milton Glaser: To Inform & Delight.

Yes design nerds, that’s the Milton Glaser“the designer who created the famous I heart NY logo.

The prize is Milton Glaser’s latest book, Drawing is Thinking.

The film will be playing on June 19th in San Francisco at the Roxie. Here’s the official synopsis:

For many, Milton Glaser is the personification of American graphic design. Best known for co-founding New York Magazine and the enduring I ? NY campaign, the full breadth of Glaser’s remarkable artistic output is revealed in this documentary portrait, Milton: To Inform and Delight. From newspapers and magazine designs, to interior spaces, logos, and brand identities, to his celebrated prints, drawings, posters and paintings, the documentary offers audiences a much richer appreciation for one of the great modern renaissance men.

Artfully directed by first time filmmaker Wendy Keys, the film glances into everyday moments of Glaser’s personal life and captures his immense warmth and humanity, and the boundless depth of his intelligence and creativity.

How to enter

Simply, post a comment below about why you heart Milton Glaser.

Comments should be substantive. I’ve got a little clever robot who will kill anything shorter than 12 words.

Be sure to include your email address when filling out the comment form. I need this so I can let you know if you win. Don’t worry, the address will remain private.

On June 19th, I will pick a winner and contact the user via email about the prize.

It’s an all day event, and it’ll be my sixth year as a reviewer. I enjoy it every time, and I’ve yet to make someone cry. Am I too nice? Perhaps, this will be my lucky year. ;-)

It looks like reservations are still available. So sign up if you’re looking for a job in this terrible economy or if you simply want portfolio feedback from Bay Area design studios.

Space is limited, so register soon:

AIGA SF Portfolio Day Registration

Can’t find greeting cards that live up to your design standards?

Check out Paper Culture, a new greeting card company co-founded by my friend and former MetaDesign colleague, Hui-ling Chen. The cards are modern, cute, and delightful. Best part, you can even personalize them with your own photos or text.

Right now, a majority of the cards are baby-oriented. But I expect to see a larger variety of different event cards once the business gets going.

Here are some more sample images:

Don’t forget to check out my previous post on other cool greeting card companies:

Where to Find Greeting Cards that Don’t Suck